In episode 1, I shared my personal history, and how I became phobic of sex. In this episode I want to put the path of the White Tigress in the perspective of other spiritual paths; one that starts with a calling.
Calling or call, is a word most commonly used for someone who enters priesthood, or enters the monastery. And for a very long time, the decision to become a servant of God, was the only alternative to starting a family. That, or becoming an old spinster should the family option not succeed.
What strikes me though, is that although in theory women’s emancipation has provided us with unlimited options, they’re rarely taken with the same determination as a real calling. How often have you heard anyone, commit to any personal journey, that is not a marriage and kids type situation? How about “never”? Want to know why?
Two factors here; a. Maybe people don’t get the call b. Because the call is almost always ignored.
Read Joseph Cambell, who wrote the Hero’s Journey;
Refusal of the summons converts the adventure into its negative. Walled in boredom, hard work, or ‘culture,’ the subject loses the power of significant affirmative action and becomes a victim to be saved. His flowering world becomes a wasteland of dry stones and his life feels meaningless—even though, like King Minos, he may through titanic effort succeed in building an empire or renown. Whatever house he builds, it will be a house of death: a labyrinth of cyclopean walls to hide from him his minotaur. All he can do is create new problems for himself and await the gradual approach of his disintegration.
From this description, you can derive its characteristics. You are hearing your call (or calling) when;
- you know that if you don’t face this, your life will be meaningless
- even though you may succeed (in other’s people’s eyes) you will always be aware of the Call you ignored.
- you will build a protective wall so that the call cannot bother you
- and within those walls you will spiritually die.
How many people do you know who have built their protective shell, with signs of status and success or even a family, when you know they are profoundly unhappy? I bet you know a hell of a lot more of them, than those who’ve joined the convent or served some other calling.
All those castle builders, family men and empire holders chose the comfort of being socially accepted and successful, over their calling. Some break free at a later age, when the suffering has become unbearable. And we laugh about the middle aged men trying to be young. Or about the women in their forties who dye their hair red and join African dancing.
When the truth is; their midlife crisis is the first attempt to answer the call they abandoned. To find their way back to meaning and joy. And some get calling when they become ill, suddenly right back in line with what it is they came here to do. Some after a burn-out.
So what I want you to understand is this: rarely ever, does anybody go on a quest to become a master of his or her life, in alignment with their destiny, unless the current situation has become absolutely unbearable. Either by slow spiritual death, mental agony or acute existential fear.
I consider The White Tigress to be a calling. It requires you to look all social conventions right in the eye, and to be prepared to live without society’s approval.
Sex is viewed in 99% of the cases, either as a leisure activity, comparable to going for a drink. Or as relationship glue. And the remaining 1% is where it is viewed as a spiritual path for couples. Rather ever is it viewed as a spiritual rich path for singles, nor is single sex (as in not in a relationship) ever identified as a source for longevity and vitality.
On the contrary. I remember exactly when I found my zest for life, as a single. I was 17, heartbroken, and aids phobic. Yet over the moon when I discovered there were many men to kiss and cuddle. My energy levels soared and my anxiety attacks were under control most of the time. But within a year my female friends at high school expelled me from their group and I also got comments from grown-ups as well. I couldn’t take the loneliness, especially since the fear was never gone. I decided I needed to go steady. So I did.
I ignored the Call of that single year of sexual abundance. Instead I built my castle. By the time I was 25 my relationship was more or less sexless. But I didn’t feel it anymore.
My once flowering worlds had become wastelands.
An Unexamined Life is Not Worth Living
note from LS Harteveld;
I’m publishing my books The Wait Worth 8 and for the final leap, I m going ALL IN. So I won’t be writing new material, for two to three weeks. In the meantime I will repost these White Tigress Notes – which were created at Facebook earlier this year.
My White Tigress teachings are based on a book by Hsi Lai and my personal journey.
You can like the White Tigress page on Facebook, or sign up for my new official White Tigress blog at; White Tigress Lair
De Witte Tijgerin – gids voor solitaire vrouwen die een geweldig seksleven willen en plenty energie