by LS Harteveld
I restarted my YouTube channel. As a yoga teacher. Not a writer. And it wasn’t planned!
In fact my plans had been diametrically opposite, to making a daily thirty minute yoga video on YouTube.
I pulled the plug from making yoga videos two months ago. There had been a variety of reasons. Each one of them a good enough for a total cancellation of the project. And yet?
One morning I got up and just couldn’t wait to start filming.
Another reason I originally had no intention of picking up my career as a spandex webcam girl, was because I had consciously decided against creating this kind of time consuming content for my yoga business.
It would be reserved for my new career. My new tribe.
The readers from my books.
After ten years I am taking my eight books public. And with this comes the responsibility to invest my efforts directly into my new career.
I would setup a new channel to promote my books..
But guess what? I never woke with the inexplicable urge to actually do that. It was something I thought I should.
Even though I knew it was essential for potential readers to see me, before they would like my page or follow me on Twitter.
Buy my book, hear me read, or send me an email.
Any type of connection and interaction would be hindered if I didn’t facilitate the ninety percent of people who preferred a video instead of reading something.
Therefore I SHOULD make videos.
If writing was my new career I absolutely, non-negotiable, HAD TO make fucking videos. LIKE A NORMAL PERSON!
Except, we’re not really normal, are we?
For instance, I already know that you are part of the ten percent who is fine with reading something. The other ninety percent, didn’t click this diary post in the first place. And I kind of like that, you and me, don’t you?
By putting all my secrets in writing, instead of revealing them in the generic way of filming myself talk, I have already filtered out anyone who is not willing to make an effort.
WE are filtering that out. You and me.
Because you are here with me, when all the others aren’t.
I once dated a guy with whom I had deep conversations. It was a time where I had a sex life, as well as male friends whose intellect fascinated me. Yet there wasn’t anybody with whom I was in love.
I could have sex with whomever I chose.
I often wished I could have the sex with the ones I found intellectually stimulating.
Yet, I never did.
Until the date said to me:
“Of course not. You share yourself physically with one guy, and you share yourself mentally with the other. That way you are safe, and neither one has both.”
I will never refer my YouTube viewers to these diary entries. They can have my body, but not my mind.
But if you like to share a physical experience, you can find all my YouTube yoga videos here.
Just don’t tell anyone.
An unexamined life is not worth living