I m now at an intake of over one viewing of Basic Instinct a day. And honestly I have no idea where I get the time.
Especially because I ve also consistently been doing my mindset work/ listening to Katrina Ruth on YouTube/ live streams on Facebook.
So how do I also watch a feature length movie a day?

And it’s so addictive, it took me days to replace it with something else. And now that I have (An Inside Job), I ve spontaneously created a home study program from all paid courses from Katrina Ruth, which I own.
In other words, it’s much more tempting to study marketing and personal development for entrepreneurs, than to watch any other movie than Basic Instinct.

And the strange thing is, it is doing something to me which I cannot explain. I really have no idea. It’s like being in love but not knowing with whom. I mean I m in love with Michael Douglas, who plays Nick Curran, but that doesn’t really explain it. This is something else, I m sure of it.

The last days have been super intense.
On Thursday I felt this high vibe of creating a new channel under my real name, but on Friday I went down the rabbit hole where I had many adventures, some in this world and others just in my head.

And it took a drastic haircut, a stationary haul, hours at the cafe AND creating an entire education out of all Katrina Ruth programs before the voices in my head finally said:
“Okay, we’re done. We’re still clueless where we’re heading but we do know what you will be doing from now on, to get there.”
Which didn’t make sense, but I took their word for it.

And in my mind I heard the lines detective Andrews said to a suspended Michael Douglas/ Nick Curran, when he comes to Andrews to ask what he has found out about Catherine Tramell’s parents: 

NICK:  Did you find out about her parents? 

ANDREWS: You’re on leave, man. You’re on psycho leave. I’m talking to a possible wacko here.

NICK: Well you know I’m wacko, Sam, what’d you find? 

They were right. It’s not about being wacko. 
It’s about what you find out.

~Lauren
An Unexamined Life is Not Worth Living

My diaries en erotica are available at my BOOK SHOP

coming soon: new books

1. Reboot – a hero’s journey. Diary 2017-2020
2. I M NOT CHANGING MY FUCKING SHOW
3. Big Mistress – confessions, columns and sex advice from the other woman
4. Blote Kont- (Dutch)
5. ALL THE THINGS – unpublished work 2010 – 2020