By cancelling my alias, the truest part of who I am

IMG_0650“By cancelling my alias, the truest part of who I am,
leaving an empty, dutiful shell that will become a successful model citizen,
where no one will die because I wasn’t careful enough,
I have done everything within my power to save a world I do not want to live in.”
I think I will write more about LS Harteveld, how she came to life 2006, the excitement of this website (since 2010!), and everything that happened, but not today.
For now I feel so incredibly tired, as if I have completed something big.
And I have.
But also: 
The real work is just beginning.
So many things to review, and books to print.
Writing everything, channeling LS Harteveld, was only the beginning.
And after death comes life.
I believe it is time for me/Lauren, to dive head first into my performance project 1994.
Or March 1995 as it is already.
And I can’t do that living in 2020 at the same time.
Although Project 1994 has started summer 2019, the Corona crisis has finally given me a reason to mentally leave 2020, and bury myself in 1995.
So we will meet again.
Either you’ll see me as curator and moderator, and publisher of LS Harteveld books.
Or you’ll one day see me publish Lauren’s secret 1995 diary, and know it started today.
Maybe after the Corona crisis Lauren will come back to whatever year it is then.
Maybe she’ll stay in the 90s and keep communicating with us through books, published never as blogposts.
But as complete diaries, books that transcend us to a different time.
For now I like to think she is a 22 year old graduate,
trying to figure out life.
Because that is exactly how I feel.
the writer formerly known as
~Lauren/LS Harteveld

coming soon: new books

1. Reboot – a hero’s journey. Diary 2017-2020
3. Big Mistress – confessions, columns and sex advice from the other woman
4. Blote Kont- (Dutch)
5. ALL THE THINGS – unpublished work 2010 – 2020

The best way to receive updates on when these books are ready is to follow my
English blog which I established in 2018:

Nederlands blog: